Where’s all my pretty zaftique chicks at? I’m tired of walking around the city, and seeing some mediocre looking girl with a hot body act all high and mighty. I’m good looking AND fit, you, my dear are BENEATH me, and have no business turning your nose up at me.

The obesity epidemic in America means that women with tight, fit bodies are fewer and further in between, and so they are getting unwarranted attention from men who find their options dwindling if they like that sort of thing. It used to be a choice between beauty and brains, and there would be those rare few who had both. Now you’ve average looking girls walking around like the own the joint cause they watch what they eat and spend a few hours on a treadmill.

ANYONE can be fit if they put their minds to it, or use the right combination of drugs/surgical procedures. Being fit is a lifestyle choice, being hot really isn’t, unless you have an awesome plastic surgeon, and even then you’ll never be as hot as someone who was genetically gifted with beauty. So here’s my call to arms: all you pretty girls need to band together and put these skinny bitches in their place! It’s your birthright to make these women feel insecure, not the other way around! Don’t let McDonald’s, Dunkin Donuts, TV, and the internet rob you of your greatest asset in this ridiculous, superficial country.

I don’t want some girl acting like I need to give her a diamond ring to get her attention when I wouldn’t even give her a pearl necklace. Get on your game ladies!