Gay people take things from us, and they don’t give them back. I don’t begrudge them this habit, lord knows they have a hard enough time as it is, but my function here is to observe, and this is one of many observations that any given person could have either figured out on their own, or probably never cared to know about in the first place.

This weekend was gay pride weekend in NYC, and as the years pass, the degree to which the city is overtaken by all things gay has been increasing sharply. This is a good thing, the more any group of people can feel comfortable expressing themselves the better, Nazis and terrorists not withstanding. however it also serves as a reminder the things gay culture have taken for their own, and taken permanently. These things that were once fair game for anyone to use as they pleased are now clear symbols of one’s gayhood. Topping the list is the symbol that was clearly visible all weekend adorning the many restaurants and bars that participated in the festivities.

The rainbow.
What was once something hippies put on their hippie vans and little girls put on their trapper keepers is now something that is firmly a symbol for gay pride. Treasure seekers be aware that today’s leprechaun although immaculately dressed and styled, will be more apt to bestow a golden shower, than a pot o gold, and will have a treasure trail you may not want to follow to the end of the path.

The word fabulous.
This word too is now completely gone. I have thus far only seen men and women over the age of 65 use it successfully, and only those who are very educated and speak with a certain old school style are able to pull it off without looking inadvertently gay.

The finger snap.
Here’s another thing that is now fully relegated to the female and homosexual. I guess since straight women can get away with this one it isn’t technically gay, but the theory holds true to a certain point: snapping your fingers to add emphasis to anything your saying emphasizes your affinity for penis.

I’m going to end this here, partially because even I find this tack somewhat offensive, and partly because I’m lazy and if I end this here I get to stop writing. Also I didn’t mean to suggest all gay people are into golden showers, in actuality, it can’t be more than 70, 75%.