Comments on: Heated debate on toilet paper orientation

By: philostopheles

philostopheles — Tue, 17 May 2011 14:04:30 +0000

My assistant just informed me the number of paper cuts on the anus has not only just doubled since i last reported, but also the number of anal warts due to the staff infections coming from these paper cuts has also tripped. This all due to the special dye used in the printing of the flowers and patterns on TP. All of which could be avoided when properly torn and folded from the proper orientation. This is a truly a sad thing.

Also note, you are not safe just using plain white TP either. Case in point plain white TP has its down side as well, as its the leading cause of skid-marks. Its been highly documented through years of study that those who use plain white TP don’t fully wipe…. need I say more.

By: philostophalies

philostophalies — Mon, 16 May 2011 18:31:56 +0000

there’s a bigger issue here in regards to what we are viewing. the true orientation will effect the angle of the flowers printed on the TP. and in that begs the questions do we want to views flowers at an angle? is a flower at any other angle still the same? what if its not just flowers, there are many other print designs now finding themselves on TP for your ass wiping enjoyment. even if just quilted, we don’t want these quilted patterns at the wrong orientation. wheres the harm you may ask?
well its as simple as preventing future injuries. TP torn at the improper angle from the wrong orientation leads to the folder of said TP again at the wrong angle leading to the number 1 cause of paper cuts on the Anus.

Do really want this?

By: Julio

Julio — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 23:29:48 +0000

As long as they’re using it…